Mischevious Neighbors

My daughter and her friend were outside the other night when some new neighborhood teens approached them. They talked a bit, then one of the new girls suggested that they play a game. When they asked what kind of game, the answer was "Ding Dong Ditch." My naive daughter and her friend didn't know what they were talking about--these new girls said to watch them. These new girls rang the doorbell of a neighbor and ran away. They ran toward my daughter and her friend, and they all ran together to hide. My daughter and her friend said that they were scared and didn't know what to do. When the neighbor whose doorbell was rung confronted the girls, they all began pointing fingers at each other. They ALL were in trouble even though only some of them participated--a perfect opportunity to teach "guilt by association." I told my daughter--once she ran, she was lumped into the group of trouble makers. If she had separated herself from the group, came home, or even talked to the neighbor about what happened instead of running--if she had avoided joining the group, she would be considered innocent. By joining a group--even if only some of the group is participating--they ALL will be blamed. Thankfully, this issue was minor--but it did bring to the forefront all of the possible situations my teens may face in the future. One big one: a group of teens hanging out--one or a few do something illegal--the police come--the entire group is blamed/arrrested/suffer the consequences--GUILT BY ASSOCIATION--its a HUGE thing for teens because their peers mean so much to them. They HAVE to learn to stand up for themselves and NOT follow the crowd--especially when they are being pressured to do something wrong. I HOPE my teens get this message--I am glad it was a SMALL issue that brought the subject into our lives and I HOPE we don't ever have to deal with a bigger, more serious version of this life lesson. Parenting teenagers is TOUGH!!