Timing is Everything

Both of my teens recently brought home paperwork about classes for next school year. This brought up issues related to our hopefully upcoming move to Florida. For now, I told them to go ahead and fill out the paperwork, just in case they were still here. BUT--we are all certainly HOPING to be in Florida by then! My son will be a Junior next year--no matter where he goes to school, he will have to take his basic courses and will have about two electives. If he doesn't choose those electives now, he may not be able to get into them in the fall. If we stay, he will get the electives he wanted. If we go, he may have a hard time choosing the electives he wants at a new school. I think he will be okay--but still, he REALLY wants to hurry up and get to Florida! Why do they make them choose their electives so early?! I hope he will be able to get the electives he wants if we move late in the summer! And my daughter--let's just say that she is NOT thrilled about starting high school here!! She is DYING to move before school starts in the fall!! They told her to go ahead and choose some electives here just in case. She cannot even begin to face that possibility! And when we move, she says that she doesn't care WHAT electives she gets because she will just be so glad to FINALLY be there! Oh, well--I just hope that everything will work out good for both of them. I WISH we could have moved earlier so this would not even be an issue. Timing really IS everything!

More Break-Ups and Broken Hearts

I don't know all of the details, but it seems that both my son and daughter are dealing with broken hearts right now. My son and his girlfriend broke up recently--and I think the ex has moved on to another guy now, and my son is heartbroken. My daughter broke up with her "school boyfriend" the other day--it seems that there were some jealousy issues, but I'm not sure. It was all so casual an innocent anyway--she wasn't really "in love"--she was a bit sad, but not too heartbroken. Now, they need some time to reflect, learn from the experience, and move on. I don't think there are any real serious issues--neither one of them were in serious relationships--thank GOD at this age!! NO--14 and 16 seems to be the stage where they are just beginning to dabble in like/love/dating/breaking-up issues. I know the tougher times are ahead, though. I hope they give themselves plenty of time to figure this out as they continue to mature. I hope they realize that they just aren't emotionally ready for REAL love and REAL relationships yet. I think they are going to be just fine!

Inauguration Day

What a beautiful day it was! I couldn't be there, but I watched every moment of it on television: AWESOME! Unfortunately, my teens were not allowed the opportunity to watch it while at school. They may have missed it as it was actually happening, but they did see a lot of news coverage about it when they returned home. My daughter and I enjoyed watching the Inauguration Balls--especially when Beyonce sang "At Last." What a special moment! What a special day!

Embarrassing Moments

My daughter has had a few embarrassing moments lately. I don't want to embarrass her further by discussing the details, so let's just say that nothing happened that would scar her for life or anything--just general, mild embarrassment. And I certainly remember how amplified and exaggerated embarrassment can be for teenagers! The best advice I can give her is to just walk back into the situation with her head held high--and sometimes laughing about it can help, too. Other than that, I guess being embarrassed every now and then is just a fact of life that everyone has to learn to live with eventually. A few days have passed since the embarrassing moments occurred--she seems to be "over it" at this point. Hallelujah! I can see that she is becoming quite resilient about these kind of things. That means that she is beginning to mature into a strong and confident young woman. I am proud of her! :)

Doctor's Appointment

My daughter needed to go to the doctor the other day, and the only doctor's office that she has been to for years is the pediatrician's office. Over the past few years, it has become increasingly clear to me that both of my teenagers have really outgrown going there--but finding new doctors is not a fun or easy task. Unless there was a problem that meant they needed to see a specialist, most visits were quick and they remained dressed--just needed to have ears/nose/throat examined or something like that. As they measured and weighed her, I realized that she is fully grown physically--and my son is, too. They may not quite be emotionally mature as adults should be, but their bodies have almost completed growing. My daughter is a half inch taller than I am--she may grow another inch or so(she is 14). My son is about as tall as his father--may grow more, too(he is 16). But they look like full grown adults! It does seem funny to see them sitting there in the waiting room with all of the little kids--and the exam rooms are decorated with cute characters--they DO look way out of place there! I will probably wait until we move and have to choose new doctors anyway--but I think our time at the pediatrician's office is just about up! Time to move on! :)

Get a Haircut!!

Have you noticed what the popular look for teenage boys is these days? SHAGGY!! Not long all over, not mullet style, not afro style--just messy/shaggy mop-top style! You remember that from the 70s, right? Like "Shaggy" on Scooby Doo? THAT is the "in" style now!! It's funny how I am suddenly feeling conservative about these things: every time I see that style(EVERYWHERE!), I cannot help it--my immediate thought is: GET A HAIRCUT!!! The fact that I am a chld of the 60s and 70s makes this ironic! I watched in horror as crew-cut fathers told their long-haired sons to: GET A HAIRCUT! Hey--I was a teenager in the 80s--I know all about the "hair bands" of that day! I don't know--I just haven't seen many teenage boys lately that I think have "good hair"--and I am HIGHLY aware that it doesn't matter what I think!--that is WHY they like it the way they do: if parents like short hair, they are going to like longer hair! Still: I may bite my tongue and not say a word, but I cannot get the words "Get a haircut" out of my mind when I see the shaggy styles worn today! And my son--he actually BELIEVES that his hair looks better with the longer shaggy style!! I showed him some of his photos from just a few months ago when he had a nice short hair cut--I HONESTLY think he looks SO much better with shorter hair! He cringed and he actually thought he looked worse with the shorter hair--he says he likes it much better like it is now(shaggy!). He also said that everyone agrees with him EXCEPT his parents!--surprise, surprise!! Oh, well! I will just bite my tongue and keep my opinion to myself I guess--this is a "pick your battles" issue--I am not worried about it (even though I think he looks SO much better with the shorter hair!!) :)

Yes Man

My son went to see "Yes Man " with his friends the other day. He said that it was funny--not the best Jim Carrey movie, but pretty funny. He had watched "Liar, Liar" on tv not long ago, and he said that it was VERY similar. I guess the idea behind both movies really are similar--kind of like "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids" and "Honey, I Blew Up the Kids"--slight differences but many similarities. Even if they were "clone movies," if it is funny, then go for it, right? Jim Carrey is brilliant in his ability to morph into these bizarre characters! Just watching his face can get most of us laughing! :)

His Teenage "Toy Store"

My son spent a long time in a really awesome music store the other day: Guitar Center. We have a few smaller music stores near our house, but we drove into the city and went to this one: it is huge! Watching him check out all of the cool stuff there reminded me of when he was little and I would take him to a toy store: the "toys" have changed, but he still gets just as excited about being surrounded by it all! Now I know that "boys and their toys" never really changes: the "toys" just get bigger and more expensive! I really enjoyed watching him "ooh" and "ahh" about things like amps, effects pedals, and other guitar accessories. They have more than just guitars there, too, so he checked out a LOT of cool things that he would like to have: he ALSO kept saying that he would LOVE to work there and maybe get a discount on some things! Since this place is far from where we live now, I don't think that would work out--but maybe we can find something just as good when we move. If my son could work in a big music store like this one, he would LOVE working!! He is really anxious to get a job soon, but transportation is definitely an issue. I keep thinking that he can do that once we move--we plan to live in an area where everything is either in walking distance or public transportation is available. Until then, an occassional trip to Guitar Center will suffice! :)

She Chose School Boy!

When my daughter returned to school, she resumed her "relationship" with the boy that she liked before the holidays. She did not mention the other boy--she does not talk to him or about him now. So, "school boy" is back! They still only seem to communicate briefly during the school day: in the morning, at lunch, between classes, and after school(they do not have any classes together this semester). It still seems very sweet and innocent: pass notes in the hall, sit together at lunch and hold hands, quick kiss goodbye at the end of the day, etc. I don't know what to expect next: who knows when the NEXT boy will come along and catch her eye! But, for now, the "school boyfriend" is back in her life. She gushes every day when she comes home from school--she can't wait to tell me every detail about what he said or if he held her hand! :) I am SO glad that she is confiding in me about this stuff! The day may come in the future when she stops doing that, so I am enjoying every minute of this sweet and innocent stage right now. Valentine's Day is around the corner--I predict sweet cards, some chocolates, and maybe even a stuffed teddy bear! :) Ah, young love is adorable! (At least when it is still in this very innocent stage!)

Being Average

When my teens returned to school, they received their report cards from the previous semester. They both had a few Bs, but they also both had several Cs. Some were high Cs, almost Bs--all-in-all, I would say that they both had "average grades" this time--not honor roll and not failing. How did they feel about it? Just fine, really. They seem to be perfectly happy scoring in "the average ranges." They were just grateful to be passing! How do I feel about it? Well, at their age, I was a high achiever--usually straight As and HATED getting Bs! BUT--I worked very hard at my school work--I put in the effort it took to make As. They work hard, but I do not think they are self-motivated enough to "go the extra mile"--and I think that is a totally inner self quality that you either have or you do not have. No one pushed me--I pushed myself--I think that is the only way it works, really. So, I do not think that there is anything I could do to "push" them into being "high achievers." If they WERE high achievers, it would be because their inner drive made them want to be that way. I honestly do not think students are high achievers because their parents or others pushed them--without that inner drive and ambition, it just would not do any good! SO--I know my teens: they are good people and they work fairly hard, but they are NOT highly ambitious and highly driven to achieve and be the best. I have talked to them about "the real world" and work ethics: the high achievers often get to the top and become the CEOs and bosses, the "average Joes" work for the CEOs but never really push hard enough to break through to the top, and the "lazy goof offs" find themselves struggling to provide the basic neccessities in life. Sometimes people can be one way in school and change later in life, but a pattern is often set during these formative years. So, my "average Joe and Jane" may go through life being "average"--and that's okay with me! Sure, it would be NICE to see them "at the top," but they don't HAVE to be that way. And, it would be tough to see them struggling "at the bottom," that's for sure. All of this is really their choice, though--nothing I can do to motivate them to be highly ambitious and driven if they are not. So, I guess they may go into adulthood as "Average Joe and Jane"--they may not get the top honors and top awards--hopefully they won't fall into a lower category and find themselves struggling just to survive--but if they go into adulthood swimming right along in the middle of the stream, I guess that is fine with me. I will love them and be proud of them no matter what they do! :) Still, I have to admit: when someone else's Joe or Jane gets top honors, it makes you wonder: could mine have done that if they had just worked harder? Maybe--but I still say that, at this point in their lives, it is ALL about THEM--if they put the work and effort into it, they can achieve. It really has very little to do with me at this point. I will always be a "proud mama" no matter what! :)

Second Semester

My son and daughter finally returned to school after a long winter break. They began a new semester when they returned. They were hoping to choose some new electives, but that apparently didn't work out. At big public schools, it isn't always easy to get into the classes that you want to take because there isn't enough room--the list fills up quickly and then you have to choose something else. So, once again, my teens are back in school but not really very happy about it. We may or may not be here through the entire semester--who knows?! But they aren't exactly begging to stay here all semester because of their classes! If we DO move mid-semester, they probably wouldn't have a lot of choices of electives in Florida right away, either. Either way, second semester is underway. Now the countdown begins: either until moving day or until the end of the school year. Change is on the horizon and we are looking forward to a new way of life!

Welcome 2009!

A quiet night at home--good food--a few fireworks--and Dick Clark on tv: Happy New Year!! My son was complaining about these kind of glasses--we are wondering if this may be the last year for them, or will they figure out how to make 2010 glasses? He thinks they will put a 1 on the bridge of the nose and make it work--and 2010 will be the last ones(hard to make 2011 work!). I think that it won't work without the double 00's--2009 will be the last ones. I guess we will see!! Happy New Year, and Welcome 2009!!