New Years Eve

When the clock strikes midnight tonight, 2008 will be over and 2009 will be here. How do I feel about that? Well, as far as I am concerned, 2008 was a really bad year for us and it will be good to have that all behind us. I don't know if 2009 will be better or worse, but I sure do hope for things to get MUCH better--things just HAVE to begin looking up for us!! I will list some resolutions/hopes for 2009:

1. SELL THE HOUSE!!!!
2. GOOD EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITIES IN FLORIDA!!
3. MOVE TO FLORIDA!!!!!!!!!
4. GOOD HIGH SCHOOLS FOR BOTH TEENS!!(freshman and junior in the fall)
5. GOOD HEALTH CARE(and affordable!)
6. STABLE FINANCES WITH A LITTLE EXTRA TO SPEND(reduce struggling!)
7. TRADE IN MINIVAN(10 years old!) FOR RED CONVERTIBLE MUSTANG!! :)

I'll stop here--pretty much the same thing I hoped that would happen in 2008--none of it happened and I am rolling it all into 2009's wishes. I sure do hope that 2009 will end up being a GOOD year for us!!!!!!

Happy New Year! Goodbye(and good riddance) 2008!! Welcome 2009--hopefully full of good things for our family! Please, 2009--please be good to us!!!!!!

Torn Between Two Lovers

Oh, my! My daughter has a dilemma now! Just before Christmas break, she had a "boyfriend" at school and she was pretty crazy about him. However, he does not have a cell phone or a MySpace, so they really only talked in school, not outside of school--and even then, they had different schedules and barely saw each other during the day. Still, they would pass notes or leave notes in each other's lockers, sit together at lunch, and sometimes sit together at school functions(but not often). A few things have occurred: a few times they have been able to sit together and hold hands, a few times they have stood together and he put his arm around her, once he kissed her on the cheek, and, on the day before Christmas break, he gave her a quick kiss goodbye on the lips. As far as she was concerned, that was her boyfriend and all was well! She was very excited about her goodbye kiss, and she was going to miss him during the holidays. He never calls her--not sure what's up with that, he can't text her(no cell phone), he can't instant message her or leave messages on MySpace(no access). Basically, if they are not at school or at a school function, they do not communicate. So, she has "missed him" during winter break and has not been able to have any contact with him at all.

Enter the dilemma: she went skating with her friend the other day. Her friend brought her cousin--a cute 14 year old boy. They hit it off, and my daughter now likes THAT boy. Apparently they skated together and held hands--and talked about "breaking up" with their significant others when they returned to school. Later, my daughter went to a movie with her friend and this boy--and my daughter and this boy kissed several times! For a few days after that, there was a lot of text messaging back and forth between my daughter and this new boy. They both seemed to really like each other, and it seemed that THEY were a new item and the "old loves" were out. My daughter said that she would tell her "school boyfriend" that she was moving on--as soon as they got back to school and they could talk again! This new boy said that he would do the same thing with HIS "school girlfriend." I think my daughter liked that this new boy could text message her and leave her messages on MySpace--they seemed a hot item--for a few days, anyway.

Well, now it seems that things have changed--just a few days later! At first, my daughter was all confused--should I "break up" with the old guy and pick this new one? Nothing was said to the first guy since there is no communication during the holidays with him. Then, she was SURE that she was going to pick the new guy--she took things off her MySpace page about the old guy and put the new guy on there--a sure sign of a break up in the teen world! Things were going good, then BOOM--suddenly, this new guy says that he might NOT break up with the other girl! Oh, boy! So...my daughter then decides that she wants to continue her"relationship" with the old guy! Now, she and the new guy say that they will just be friends!

So, when she returns to school, she has no plans to tell the old guy anything about the new guy. Only problem is, her friend kind of has a big mouth(the new guy's cousin). Now she is wondering what she should do. Oh, boy--the love lives of 14 year olds! There have already been issues with things like "cheating" and "breaking up" and "dating my best friend's ex" among my daughter's friends. But, are those issues REALLY important at this stage of the game? If an 8th grade boy and girl pass notes, hold hands, and grab a quick kiss--does that really mean that they are "a couple"? If one or both of them hold hands with and kiss someone else, is it really "cheating"? If one of them tells the other that they are "moving on," is that really a "break up"? And, is it really terrible if 14 year olds end up "dating" several different people--many of which end up being "a friend's ex"? Oh, boy--we have now entered the REAL world of teen dating, haven't we? Maybe not as serious as it will be in a few years, but still...it is a scary thing!

Here is what I told my daughter--and I was drawing on MY experience as a 14 year old girl: I had a "first boyfriend" who gave me my first kiss(first make out session, really!)--a few days later, he was over it and we "broke up." I felt kind of used, but then again, maybe I used him, too--to get that first kiss! Later, a guy at school sat by me and held my hand a few times--it was kind of developing into a thing, but just starting. Then, another guy who knew my friend from a different school called me, came to visit, and we kissed a few times. For a few weeks, I "dated" both guys--the saying was, "I just want to date around and not get serious." After a few weeks, one guy(not the one at school) asked me to "go with him"--the equivalent of "going steady." I said yes, then I told the guy at school about it--basically, "breaking up" with him and then "going with" the other guy. A few months passed, and we "broke up"--I dated other guys again--a different guy every few weeks. The next school year, I ended up "going with" the original school guy--I also ended up "going out with" the guy who gave me my first kiss! It all ended eventually--and then, my junior year, I started dating my high school sweetheart--we stayed together throughout high school.

OK--so I told all of that to show something: teens, at this age, are very very fickle! They say they "love" someone--they kiss and make out--and then, a few weeks later, they are in the same situation with someone else. And--it is ok!! Actually, this is probably how it should be, because getting too serious too young can definitely lead to more problems. So, I told my daughter(and I tell my son, too)--for now, just relax and be casual about dating--do what used to be called "dating around." It is perfectly fine to like lots of different people--it is fine to go on dates with different people--it is fine to holds hands with/cuddle with/kiss different people--keep it casual! I don't see my daughter's dilemma as "cheating"--it isn't even in the same ball park as grown-up love and cheating. I think it would even be okay to have a "school boyfriend," a "neighborhood boyfriend," a "sometimes get together boyfriend," and even a "vacation boyfriend"--at least in this stage of the dating game. They should probably avoid the "going together"/"going steady" stage at this age anyway. They may say, "that's my boyfriend/girlfriend"--but that is a very casual bond at this stage. My daughter's crush last year(never even kissed) still flirts with her--she tells him to leave her alone because she has a boyfriend. Yet, when a cute guy at the skating rink holds her hand or kisses her at a movie, she quickly tosses the old guy out and welcomes the new guy. And when the new guy calls a halt to things, she goes back to the old guy. Who knows--maybe the old guy had a new girl over the holidays, too! Considering the fact that they ONLY communicate during school, he may even have other girls in other situations, too! And that would be ok!

So, we will see what happens when they go back to school. I think old guy is very shy--much more so than new guy. Maybe the note passing, hand holding, and occasional kiss will continue--or maybe not. And, who knows--there could be yet ANOTHER new guy come along in the next few weeks or months! OMG--this is making me, her mother, very nervous! I mean, my "baby girl" now knows what it is like to kiss and make out during a movie!! OMG!! We are now past the very innocent crush stage--and past the "will he hold my hand" stage--we are now in the "you wanna make out" stage!!!! Oh, please stay in THAT stage a LONG LONG time!!!!!!! I hope we don't move forward to the NEXT stage for a very long time!!!! I will continue to talk to my daughter about these issues--I remember quite well how persistent teenage boys can be about pushing girls into things!! I want her to be strong and stand up for herself--it is HER call, not the boys!! I hope she will be strong about these issues!! I did a pretty good job about that at her age--boys knew what they could and could NOT get me to do!!!! Oh my lord--I cannot believe that I am now the parent of a teenager going through these issues!!!! And this is my "baby girl" we are talking about--my son is ahead of her in this game. Isn't is ironic--when we are teenagers going through these things, we often give NO thought to what our parents would say--and when we are the parents, we want to be SO involved in the issue at hand!! Just let us survive this intact with no serious consequences--that is our biggest goal! Learn about love, experience heartbreak, but please don't do anything that would seriously affect you for the rest of your life! So, here we go--the innocence is over and the scary ride is REALLY beginning!! Hang on for dear life!!!!!

Marley and Me

My daughter and I went to see the movie Marley and Me the other day. I LOVED it! She liked it a lot, too! It is NOT just about a dog--it is about marriage, family, career, midlife crisis, etc. I absolutely recommend it--it was really good! :) Only thing is: it made me think about OUR family dog.

Oh, boy--what are we going to do about our dog! On the one hand, our lab is very calm and is NOTHING like Marley. I even came home and gave her a bit of attention and praise because I realized that she really IS a good dog! BUT--we didn't get her when the kids were little. They were about 10 and 12 when she was born and we brought her home. The dog was NOT our "first child," as Marley seemed to be for the Grogans. I had years of motherhood under my belt before becoming a dog owner. Honestly, I was NOT so thrilled about having a dog in the house! I mean, my kids were finally getting old enough to do lots of things on their own, and here comes a puppy who needs almost as much care as a baby does! So, looking back--if we were going to have a family dog, we should have done it sooner--or NOT do it at all. When my husband brought the dog home, all I could think is: Just when I get the kids almost raised, here we go again! No--here I go again...it would all fall on MY shoulders! And, sure enough, the kids went to school, the husband traveled on business, and guess who got stuck with pet care? Yep--me, the one who really did NOT want to have a dog! I am just not a pet person! I don't want to stop what I am doing to care for an animal! I am not cruel-I just don't want the responsibility. I LOVE caring for my kids, but they are growing up. I resent the times that I have to be the caretaker for the dog that THEY wanted, not me. I do it, but I resent it--and I never really bonded with the dog as they did(at least my husband and son). When they are home, the dog is THEIR responsibility, not mine. And when they are gone, I do what needs to be done, but I do NOT enjoy it. I know I have written about this before, but the movie made me think about it again. Basically, the dog was their first "child", the kids grew up with the dog, and...SPOILER ALERT: the dog dies when the kids are still young. Even though I am not a dog person, I admit that I cried about the dog! But this scene won't be happening the same way in our family. We had two kids for over a decade before we had a dog--the dog grew up during our kids' adolescence--and, if the dog lives a long and healthy life, our two teens will grow up and move away when the dog is about 6 to 8 years old. PROBLEM: I do not want to continue to take care of a dog for 5 to 7 years after my kids leave home! When I am living child-free, I also want to be living pet-free! SO...this is going to be a REAL problem in the future! ALSO: when we finally DO move to Florida, the dog will only be about 4 or 5 years old--and we are going to be living in a small apartment(one that does NOT allow dogs!)--so there is definitely a problem there, too. Since we didn't have a dog when the kids were little, since the dog's life span isn't coinciding with their early childhood and ending during that time, and since we have all of those other issues--we won't be having the same situation as the Grogans did. Basically, our story is VERY different: while our dog is GOOD and NOT like Marley, her life span is NOT following our family timeline in the same way.

So, Marley and Me was good because it tied the life of a dog into the timeline of a marriage and family. It made me think about OUR dog and OUR family timeline. As good as our dog is, I cannot change the fact that her lifespan is not going to fit so perfectly into our family timeline as Marley did with the Grogans. Life in a house with a big yard, young kids, and a stay-at-home-mother: often that is a great place for a dog! Life in an small apartment with no yard, teenagers or grown children who move away, a busy career woman who travels and has no time to care for a pet--that is NOT so ideal! This is a looming crisis in our family--it is going to "hit the fan" one day soon! Either when we move into an apartment that will not allow dogs, or maybe later when the kids grow up and leave home--at some point, the day of reckoning will occur. I am determined to make sure that the dog is loved and goes to a good home--I have some ideas, but nothing is certain right now. For now, my son and my husband will NOT even consider this idea, but they will HAVE to figure something out in the near future. One possibility in our moving plans: I go to Florida and get an apartment while my husband stays here(and the dog stays with him). This is not a long-term plan, but it may be the way we HAVE to do it. And if we do, then maybe my husband will have to figure it all out and I won't have to be "the bad guy." If he has to continue to travel a lot and I am not there to care for the dog while he is gone, he will realize that there is a problem. He will also realize that the dog cannot come stay with me in a small apartment in Florida while I am working full-time. He knows the family that owns the farm where our dog was born--there are "dog relatives" of our dog there. He also knows some of his relatives that might can take the dog. Maybe I can just move to Florida and get our apartment set up while the dog stays with him, and then he can figure it all out. That would be a big relief for me! Well, we will see what the future holds. Our dog is not Marley, and her story is not the same story--we will have to wait and see what OUR story looks like!

My Gift To Myself!

While I was out shopping, I found a great deal on a new digital camera for myself, too! I did a lot of research, and I decided that I wanted a Canon. I couldn't afford most of them, but I found some that were reasonably priced and had received great reviews. Maybe one day I can get the Rebel, but for now, the PowerShot will do! My purpose for upgrading MY camera was two-fold: one, my Sony Cybershot is from 2003 and was only 3 mp and two, my son said that he would be happy with my Sony if I ever upgraded to a new camera for myself. This kind of rounded out everything: between birthdays, Christmases, and other occasions, my teens have now received just about everything they think they need regarding "teen technology." Now they both have good cell phones(with cameras), good digital cameras, good mp3 players, portable dvd players, stereos, cd players, etc. They have access to our two family computers. They have access to things like PS2, Nintendo DS, and Nintendo Wii. They have access to satellite television. Basically, they have almost everything that they THINK they need! They will always WANT more, but they are doing pretty good right now! Maybe in the future, things like laptops, cars, and other more expensive items will be on their list--and MAYBE they will get some of them--but, for now, they are doing pretty well. So, getting a better camera for me meant giving my son my Sony Cybershot--he is happy about that, and so am I! And my daughter is perfectly happy with her new camera, too, so all is well. Now, if they don't want ME to take their picture, hopefully they will take pictures of themselves and I can copy them from the computer! :) I have had pretty good luck documenting their teen years this way. If I get out my camera, they go running--they don't want to pose for me! BUT--they seem to LOVE to take photos of themselves and their friends--and they upload them onto the family computer--and I copy and paste them into MY picture folders! THAT is how you can get good photos of your teens! :) Still, I may sneak a few in when they aren't looking, and I do take a LOT of photos of all of their teen stuff around the house. I just LOVE documenting their lives this way--I think ONE day that they will appreciate it(far into the future!).

His and Her Gifts

Although these weren't their only presents, these two things were their MAIN presents this year. My son requested a Sansa since I-pods were too expensive. To be honest, I really LIKE the Sansa BETTER than the I-pod! It has more features and costs a LOT less!! And I was able to find him an 8 gb Sansa for almost half of what an 8 gb I-pod costs! My daughter had already spotted a camera that she wanted when we were shopping one day. I also lucked up and found a great price on it, too! I had to fight traffic, weed my way through crowds, wait for what seemed like an eternity for a salesperson to help me, go through the same process at several different stores around town, finally find the right things at the right price, and wait in long lines to purchase them. It wasn't easy, but it was worth it! And they both seemed VERY happy with their gifts! :) Merry Christmas to my teens! :) I am glad to see that you both are happy with your presents! :)

Christmas On A Small Scale

Everything was on a small scale this year, including our Christmas tree. We had packed most of our ornaments and decorations away last year because we were certain that we were moving soon. When it turned out that we would be here for yet another Christmas, we couldn't bear to unpack everything. So we decided to choose a small tree and put a few small ornaments on it that were on the top of the box. It wasn't so bad, really--it did the job, I guess. We just didn't have a lot of Christmas spirit this year--a small tree with a few decorations seemed appropriate. We almost skipped having a tree, but it just didn't feel right to do that--so we got a small tree at the last minute. We didn't even water it because we put it up just a day or two before Christmas--no need to try to prolong it! Anyway--everything was on a smaller scale this year, but it still seemed to turn out okay anyway. Still, we couldn't help looking to the future a bit and imagining a bigger and better Christmas NEXT year--HOPEFULLY in Florida!! We thought that THIS year we were going to be there having a Florida Christmas--I cannot believe that we are STILL here!!! But...maybe next year...we HOPE!!!

Christmas Stress

I felt my own sense of stress during the week before Christmas. Even though I was determined to keep things low key, I still found myself in the midst of the craziness of Christmas. Mostly, I got caught in Christmas traffic(it was CRAZY!) and I got caught in Christmas crowds(also CRAZY!). By the time I finished shopping, I felt quite stressed and I certainly did not feel "in the Christmas spirit." One good thing, though--even though it took a LONG time to complete my shopping, I did find some good sales and bargains. I think I did quite well keeping within our small budget this year. My teens may not have had a huge spread under the tree, but they were happy with the things that I found for them. I am sure that MANY families had to have small Christmases this year--hopefully everyone found a way to make the holidays special even if they had to be on a very small scale. Maybe next year things will be better--I certainly hope so! For us, there are only 2 more Christmases left with my son before he leaves home--and 4 more with my daughter: I want to make those last few holidays special ones for them. I know that the way to do that is NOT to spoil them rotten with material things, but to make the last holidays at home with family special ones. Still, they don't want to be treated as children as they prepare to leave home, so there are many things we did for years that they absolutely do not want to do now. I will try to do some things in the next few years during the holidays that will give them good closure on their years at home. Hopefully we will still get together for the holidays when they are grown and on their own, but it will never be the same as it is now. Christmas in 2009, 2010, 2011, and 2012 won't look anything like it did for us when they were young children, but I hope we can make some wonderful memories as they enjoy their last Christmases from the perspective of living at home. I have some good ideas that I hope to implement during this time--hopefully I can pull them off! And then, once they are grown and on their own, I have some ideas on how to enjoy the holidays together during that time, too--and they won't be traditional holidays at all! So, even though things are changing, I hope to make it through the Christmas stress each year to make things special for my teens during the holidays. It can be a challenge, but I think I am doing okay so far!

Exam Stress

My son and daughter both had to complete exams and projects before beginning Christmas break. Although it was a stressful time, they both seem to feel confident about their grades and are just happy to complete the semester. Once exam week was over, they both felt a lot of relief and were anxious to begin their long Christmas break. It finally arrived, and they were very glad!

Nothing Like The Holidays

While my daughter and her friend were watching Twilight, I went to see Nothing Like The Holidays. I had expected it to be similar to Four Christmases, but it was actually quite different. There were some funny moments, but it was definitely a drama, not a comedy. And I actually liked it even better than Four Christmases! Of course, that's just my opinion--I like movies that make me cry a lot more than movies that make me laugh! :) And I did find myself wiping tears away a bit during this movie--to me, that is the measure of a good film: if it makes me cry! :)

Earlier, I had written about family traditions and the holidays. I am ready to leave most of the old traditions behind and begin new and very different ones. A challenging holiday, to me, is one where I am having to stand up to outdated traditions and explain my reasons for not wanting to do things "the way we used to do them." This movie was all about traditions, and many family members were upset about the possibility of changing them. It was an interesting perspective to see the views expressed in this film. For the most part, tradition and roots won out and the family in the film was happy about it. It made me think about my own family--we are very different from the family in the film, but my older family members are steeped in tradition as this family was. Their family was large and of Puerto Rican descent--my family is small and Anglo. I imagined what my family would be like if there were more of us--maybe family traditions would mean more, or maybe not. But the overriding theme of the movie seemed to be about family, tradition, roots, home, etc.--the very things that I am kind of rebelling from and moving away from lately. Even though this movie was essentially pulling the audience in a different direction than I wanted to go, I still really enjoyed it. It was interesting to see a very different kind of family portrayed, and it was a nice change from the typical "traditional" family seen in most holiday movies. I really like the movie even though I don't want to continue the old family traditions as they did! :)

Twilight

My daughter and her friend went to see Twilight this weekend. It was my daughter's frst time to see it and her friend's third time to see it. I think that my daughter's friend is a really big fan of the book series. They both ranted and raved about it--mostly about the romance aspect! I get the idea that teenage girls love watching movies about teen love, but the vampire part...not so much! But apparently this movie makes that part seem less important when compared to the love story that guides the plot. Not my type of movie, but teenage girls seem to really like it! :)

The Dark Knight

My son went to his friend's house and they watched The Dark Knight on blueray DVD. My son said that it was very good, although his friend is a much bigger fan of that genre. Even though they both liked it, I think the James Bond movie ranked higher in my son's opinion. At this age, they don't exactly give you complete movie reviews and evaluations--I just have to go by the few statements he made when he returned home! :) He seemed to like the movie, but I wouldn't say that it was one of his favorites. I guess it all depends on what kind of movies you like the best! :)

Peppermint Chocolate Chip MIlkshake

After shoe shopping, my daughter and I went to lunch at Chick-fil-A. We both like their chicken sandwiches--and we LOVE their milkshakes! She stuck with her traditional chocolate milkshake, but I tried their holiday specialty--a peppermint chocolate chip milkshake. MMM...MMM...GOOD!!!! It was delicious!!!!! They won't last past the holidays, so I recommend getting one as soon as you can--they are SOOOOO good!!!!!

Payless Shoes

My daughter and I went shopping the other day and found some really cute shoes at Payless. We managed to hit their "Bo-Go" Sale (Buy one, get one half off)--and we found some really good deals. We also looked at WalMart and Target, but we found our best deals at Payless this time. My daughter needed some new shoes for school and we found some cute and inexpensive choices there. I have been to several Payless stores over the years--some are larger than others. This one was medium-sized, I guess. I would like to find where the largest one in our area is located--we might can find even MORE choices there! :)

Guitars Can Be Better Than Cars!

So, now that my son is 16, many people think that it is time to go car shopping. But the reality is, we just cannot afford to do so right now. Hopefully in the future, but not any time soon. I have to admit that I felt bad about that--not guilty, because it is what it is...money is very tight right now, but I had a hard time deciding what would make a really good present for a very important birthday--and not break the bank! My son kind of guided me in the direction he wanted to go in--he made a list of things that he liked. There were some things on the list such as video games and consoles that I did not want to do--he has enough of those already. That didn't seem special enough. He also wanted to upgrade his cell phone and mp3 player--but he wanted the top of the line stuff! And, he would like to have his own computer, but I am still using a laptop with a broken screen hooked up to an old monitor--um...if anyone needs a new computer, it would be me! So there were a lot of things on his list that were just way over budget and we just can not get them right now. And the idea of a car--we put that out of his mind months ago and told him bluntly that we just cannot afford to do that right now--so he didn't even ask.

BUT--one thing that was on his list was a new electric guitar. He had one from when he was younger, but it was very small and simple. Last year, he bought a bass guitar with his birthday and Christmas money. He plays that thing constantly, and he is really getting pretty good on it. This year, he wanted to upgrade his electric guitar(not the bass)--he wanted to learn to play some of the songs that he really likes, and what he had was just not working. We looked through a catalog and he showed me some things that he liked. We also went to a music store and he showed me some things--it reminded me a lot of when he was young and in the toy store, but this time he was oohing and aahing over instruments. His taste in "toys" have definitely changed--and so have the pricetags!! But I learned a bit about the world of musical instruments--there are the big name brands that cost a lot of money, and there are off brands that are made cheaply and cost less--and then there is a group of instruments in the middle that are made by the same big name companies as the expensive brands, but are made under a different name and cost a lot less. Apparently, in the world of guitars, the most expensive guitars are under the brand name Gibson. I think many professional musicians have Gibsons. We cannot affford a Gibson. Then, I think Gibson makes a brand named Les Paul--also over our budget. Finally, Gibson makes a brand named Epiphone. The name may not be as well known, but it is made by the famous parent company, Gibson. So, buying an Epiphone is essentially buying a Gibson, although I am sure that the materials and handiwork are not as high of quality as a true Gibson. My son knows that we cannot afford a true Gibson, but we can swing an Epiphone. It isn't cheap, but it is MUCH less expensive than a true Gibson guitar--and especially less expensive than a car or many other things that could have been on his list!

So, that is what we bought our son for his birthday: an Epiphone electric guitar. The one we bought him comes with an amp and other accessories. The guitar, plus some cell phone minutes, were all we could afford--and it wasn't cheap! While I was feeling a bit down because I am used to buying lots of birthday presents instead of just one, my son was thrilled to death with his one present! I kept telling him, if love were money I would buy you everything on your list AND a car, but reality made that impossible. I don't know what I was worried about--he was truly on cloud nine about his guitar!! I know, I know--it's the thought that counts and all of that. And there are many families who are having a tougher time than we are--I know that for certain. And we never were the kind of family who could throw expensive elaborate parties and buy luxury cars for our teens like they do on MTV--that has ALWAYS been way above OUR heads!! But still--I was hoping to at least purchase an inexpensive used car for my son to drive--just as my parents had done for me when I was 16--but we just can't. Times are tough right now--for almost everyone. As we watch my son's friends turn 16 this year, I wonder who will get their kids a car, and who will not. Many of his friends come from families who seem to be doing better than we are through this recession--but you never know. And it really doesn't matter what "they" are doing--We are doing what WE can during these tough times--that really is all that matters.

My son was VERY VERY appreciative of his new guitar! He told me that he really didn't care about getting a car--that this is what he REALLY wanted! He used his birthday money from relatives to buy some accessories, and he played his heart out! And he is really good! It will take some time for him to really get it all down, but he is a fast learner. One of the things he bought to go with the guitar adds special effects sounds to it--it sounds really awesome! Listening to him play reminds me a lot of the rock bands I liked when I was his age! I know--he still has a long way to go, but he is really quite talented! He has ALWAYS been very interested and talented in music, and he is really beginning to express himself a lot through music. I can't wait to see/hear what he does next! Happy birthday, son! I am very glad that your new guitar makes you so happy! :)

Happy 16th Birthday!!!

My son is 16 today!! OMG!! Sixteen years old!! He still has to complete his online drivers education course before he can take his driving test, so he won't be going to do that today. But soon...very soon! Maybe in a week or two--and then he will have to go through that awful stressful situation of driving for an examiner and getting rated on his every move. Aahh! Remember that? I don't envy him! I do know that he should practice parallel parking a lot more before he goes--one of his friends failed that more than once! I will write about it all, and I will especially write about how I feel when I give him the keys and he drives alone for the very first time. OMG! I cannot believe that this day has arrived!!! He says that he wants to take a "road trip" alone once he gets his license. I am leaning more toward a day out alone, or a few hours out alone! But it does remind me of that awesome feeling of freedom when you first drive alone. Those of us who have driven for years sometimes get bogged down in the drudgery of it all. Sometimes we groan and complain if we have to drive somewhere, don't we? But remember that feeling, when getting in the car ALONE and driving to the store ALONE was about the BEST feeling in the whole wide world?!! My son is just days away from experiencing this feeling for the first time. It is both scary AND exciting, coming from a parental point-of-view. And I know that every minute that he is out on the road, I will be sitting at home worrying and watching the clock. I still cannot believe that I am on the OTHER side of this whole equation!! Mom and Dad, now I FINALLY am beginning to understand how you felt when I was this age!! It is a very different feeling when you are waiting at home for a teenager to return safely, and I know that the thought will never even cross his mind--he will be having so much fun enjoying his new freedom that he won't give a single thought to how I feel about it all!! And that, my friends, is the whole ball game: we remember what it was like to be their age, but they have NO clue what it is like to be us!! Happy Birthday, Son!! Even though I may embarrass you by saying it, I love you and hope that you have a wonderful day!! :)

Starbucks Holiday Drinks

I enjoyed a few of Starbucks Holiday Drinks this weekend, and they are delicious! I tried the Gingersnap Latte and the Peppermint Mocha Twist. Both were very yummy! My son had the Caramel Truffle, I think. He said that it was good. My daughter stuck to just plain hot chocolate--she is not really a fan of coffee like her brother and I are. I know that we can't indulge in these too often, but we did enjoy them very much! Way to go, Starbucks! Two thumbs up! :)

James Bond Movie: Quantum of Solace

When my daughter and I went to see "Four Christmases," my son decided to go to the latest James Bond movie. He really enjoyed "Casino Royale," and this was the sequel to that one. He said that the plot continued just a few minutes after the other one had ended. He liked it and was glad to have seen it, but I couldn't get much more of a critique from him beyond that. If you like Bond movies, I am sure that you will like this one, too! :)

Holiday Movie: Four Christmases

My daughter and I went to see "Four Christmases" over the weekend. It was funny! Maybe not the absolutely BEST holiday movie, but it was cute. It kind of reminded me a bit of "Christmas with the Kranks"--a lot of "slapstick comedy" and overall silliness. I guess the main thing I liked about it was seeing how UN-traditional holidays can be for many people today! In this story, both sets of parents are divorced, so they visit each parent separately--and much mayhem ensues at each house. If each family and household could be described in one word, it might be something like this: young couple--non-traditional, his dad--redneck, his mom--hippie, her mom--cougar, her dad--doting. Interestingly enough, there really didn't seem to be any "traditional families" in the bunch! So, even though this young couple had to deal with many issues, one issue they seemed to escape was traditionalism! Everyone has their own axe to grind, I guess. For me, my holidays used to be spent trying to explain why I did not want to be "just like them" or do things "just like they do." As time went on, though, it seems that NON-traditionalism has won out, at least in my family! Maybe that is why I liked the movie--a bunch of people doing things VERY differently than "how we've always done it." It was fun to see the craziness that ensued when everyone "did their own thing'! :)

Thanksgiving: Image vs. Reality

Did your Thanksgiving look anything like this? I know that mine certainly did not! The funny thing is, some of my older family members tried very hard to have that "Norman Rockwell image" during the holidays when I was growing up. We would all gather at my grandmother's house--we were expected to wear our "Sunday best"--we sat around the formal dining room table(although there WAS a "kid's table" in the kitchen!)--all of our table manners were used and critiqued--and the older adults usually set the tone and conversation for the day. In some ways, this image was very similar to the way things went when I was younger. But time moves on--people change--older generations pass on and younger generations take their place. Now, in my family, there are no longer any "Norman Rockwell holidays." This isn't necessarily a bad thing, though. That particular image was created around the middle of the 20th century--a bit earlier than that, really. Now that we are deep into the 21st century, it seems a bit silly to try to make our holidays look ANYTHING like this severely outdated image! Sometimes advertisements try to hold on to those images, though--they try to tweak our sentimental side and get us to thinking that it "should" look like that--and if it doesn't, maybe WE did something wrong. But the truth is, the only thing "wrong" with not "living up to the image" is the image itself. America needs to move on. This can apply to many things that may fall into the categories of "the American dream" or "an American tradition." That was then, this is now. Life is not going to look the same, nor should it.

When I am the age of the grandmother in the portrait, my holidays aren't going to look anything like that--heck, I don't plan on looking anything like she does, either! I want to LOOK like a "modern grandmother"--not a "traditional" one. And I don't plan on having traditional holiday celebrations, either. I plan on living in a small apartment or condo, so I won't be inviting all of my relatives over to my place. If my grown children want to host the holidays in their homes, I would love to visit them and do things THEIR way--not mine!--and NOT my ancestors traditional ways. If they do come to visit me, I would love to take them out for a nice dinner at a nice restaurant--no cooking for me, thank you! There won't be any "family recipes" because they died with the people who created them--and no one in my generation wanted to keep the tradition. Either store-bought, ready-made, or catered for us! And that's ok! No--I don't think that I will EVER again be part of that scene--no more traditional "Norman Rockwell holidays"--and that's fine with me. And my teens are even more accepting of this than I am because they have never really done things that way. The whole idea of "1950s traditional" is beyond their comprehension--never lived it, why start now? We are starting our own new traditions in the new century--and the next generation will probably toss it all aside and create THEIR own way of doing things. That is how life should be--moving forward into the next generation. So happy Thanksgiving, however you celebrated it!